Hello everyone! Hope your Thanksgiving is going well if you are in the US. Everyone else, well…carry on with your week! What’s new? Not too much. I am a huge fan of hooking. Just thought I’d mention that. It’s a win for everyone. Wives who for whatever ludicrous reason decide that sex is out should be hooking’s A number one fan. Her husband/boyfriend gets the urge for a blowjob, she hates dick in her mouth for whatever silly reason; he heads out to see his pay for play girlfriend, gets said blowjob, comes home, happy, plays with the kids, helps with the dishes, and kisses her goodnight. All is good. The only thing she should be saying is “did you remember to tip her?” Enough about hookers, I could go all day about them, the good, the bad, the ugly. For the vast majority that you never hear from nor will you ever, it’s a wonderful life. You hear about human trafficking and all that, which, sure, it’s awful…but vastly exaggerated, and I do mean vastly. Nobody is forcing these women into prostitution…they are very willing participants. Wait..I’m still going on about them.
Think about this for a sec, when you say poop I’m pretty sure your mouth makes the same motion as your asshole. Same is probably not true for “explosive diarrhea.” Not sure how one would go about checking that out. Just saying.
I like to watch weird porn. They don’t make it weird enough for me. If they do, I haven’t found it. I saw this 3D video where this totally hot chick had the power to shrink dicks to tiny, skinny, itty bitty little things. I wan’t to do that. Shrink them just like the head shrinker did at the end of Beetlejuice. They are so cute when they are that small and the mental power I could get over dudes with pencil thin cocks two inches long would be amazing. I could just flick them with my finger and they would spit out their little load then shrink even more. Fuck that turns me on. Would I give them their big dick back? Nope. I would fuck guys in front of him so he knows that every dude is superior to him in the dick department. Yes, I am very weird. Who cares. It’s all good fun unless you end up with a shrunken dick. Actually, if you could deal with it, it would get my attention every damn day!
Lets get past all this massive positivity thing. It’s literally lying to yourself. Folks, we got to quit lying to ourselves and everyone else. Lets break a few things down. The King Daddy number one Lying to yourself is: “I’m not fat, I’m just curvy in a sexy way.” Truth is stuffing to much food down your throat isn’t healthy and it definitely decreases your chances of getting laid. Thats a truth. I know it sucks, but it’s the truth. There is no point or silly term like fat shaming to invalidate it, it’s simple biology and mathematics. Number of calories in minus calories burned. Feel free to call me an asshole for saying it. We will take up other truths at another time.
Guys, don’t let chicks turn you into pussies. You know what I mean. You don’t have to be Mr #MeToo and you don’t have to give up your balls. Just saying. I am seeing way to many fruit balls in the good old US of A and I’m getting worried about how we could possibly defend ourselves with the pussification of our youth. Just go to a mall, a gym, anywhere, its boys who look weaker than girls and would never consider changing their own tire because they might get grease under their fingernails. If your chick has packed on weight, can’t pay her own way, doesn’t want to have sex, doesn’t clean, doesn’t cook, has addictions, has no goals…then what the fuck are you still doing with her? Get a new one pronto. Just remember…she should apply that list to yourself as well.
Lets move on to guys and balls. Girls get to have tits. I think the balls is a better deal. They do something besides attract. Balls can be attractive…if you shave them and they don’t sag down to your knees, otherwise they are just functional. I like a big, round, cum filled set of balls. So full that if you squeeze them, pre-cum leaks out. I have often wondered what it must feel like to have balls and release and drain them of cum. It must be satisfying. It looks satisfying. If you squeeze my tits, your dick gets hard. Nothing really happens on my end other than knowing I am about to get a piece of your dick. Which is a good thing but I still think balls are the better deal. Just saying. Where am I at with all of this? Not a clue. Sorry for dragging you through it. Still moving on.
That’s enough for the day. I got shit to do. I’m sure I have pissed most of you off, a bad habit of mine. I type before my mind can stop me. If I offended you in anyway than I am truly sorry…that you are such a pussy. Grow a pair, even if you’re a chick, metaphorically find your balls and man up. I should say find your vagina because I know my box can take a hell of a pounding most your guys balls wouldn’t even consider survivable. Just saying. Catch you later!